So This Is Christmas...

Some festive scenes... night shots are always a challenge!

I'm now officially on holiday until the 4th of January, and about to join the millions of others across the UK today travelling to family for Christmas. After almost a week of travel chaos....airport closures, trains not running and roads turned to skating rinks....the weather has thankfully eased a bit and we'll be able to get going.

I hope you and your families all have a very happy Christmas, and safe travelling if you're going anywhere this festive season!



Seasons Greetings!

How Did I Do?

As the year draws rapidly to an end, it’s time for me to revisit my Hope To Do List For 2010 and see how I got on with my goals...



1. Become Master Ninja at Aikido

Ha! This is never actually going to happen...I struggle to work out my left foot from my right most of the time. Then there's the minor issue of a morbid fear of rolling head over heels (break falling). Amazingly, I did manage to pass my first grading though.

2. Get superfit and svelte

I’m certainly fitter (thanks to the energetic Aikido classes and boxercise sessions with Muscle Man) but as long as there is a source of chocolate on this planet, I’m never ever going to be svelte...

3. Run the 10 km Race For Life

Well, it was more of a jog/shuffle/hobble than a run, but I did it, raising £175 for Cancer Research. Then I walked a half marathon, raising £225 for Macmillan Cancer Support. I’m very glad that I took part in both.

4. See the Dutch bulbfields

I really tried to...but I hadn’t counted on a $%^&ing Icelandic volcano spewing an ash cloud into the sky and shutting down European airspace, just a few days before I was scheduled to leave. I am still fighting for my travel insurance to cough up the money they owe me for my cancelled trip, and along with hundreds of thousands of equally conned people, I’m waiting on the Financial Ombudsman to make her final decision. I'm not holding my breath...

5. Take a city break in Berlin

Didn’t happen. I was a bit put off city breaks after the Amsterdam fiasco. I did get to see Lisbon (briefly as I was at a conference), somehow managing to fly in and out between ash cloud disruptions, and I was wowed by the beautiful city of Seville during the Andalusian adventure. 

6. Visit Canada (or China or Japan)

O Canada!  I had a fantastic trip to Vancouver Island and the Rockies in June that you may have read about in my couple of dozen posts. Absolutely loved it and hope to return soon. As for China or Japan...watch this space as we’re hoping to squeeze in a visit somewhere in the East in the second half of 2011.



7. Stop worrying about things I cannot control

Definitely didn’t happen. I have spent a large part of the year worrying about something or another, most often my dad’s health, which has unfortunately not been too great lately.

8. Overcome my fear of driving

I was forced into this.... with B being away for business and my dad in and out of hospital in another part of the country, I had to do some hairy driving on Britain’s motorways this year. Now, with the icey weather upon us, I’m trying to get to grips (literally) with snow driving.

9. Let go of people who bring me down

Again, this didn’t really happen, although I’ve learnt to sometimes screen my calls….some days I just can’t deal with anyone else’s (really quite trivial, self-inflicted) problems.

10. Plan and save for a new kitchen

This became quite urgent earlier this month, when the door fell off our oven…it’s back on now, but we broke the handle in the process, meaning we now have to prise the door open with a knife and burn ourselves senseless. I've decided I want a sleek black and white kitchen….the designs are in, finances are under review, so watch this space.

11. Learn to cook properly

While having a decrepit oven doesn’t inspire me to undertake anything too complicated, I can make some damn good lamb stew (in the slow cooker), roast chicken and lasagna, and I can bake a great banana bread. What else would anyone want? Best thing I bought this year…an egg poaching pan.



12. Watch 3 classic films

Does watching 'Love Actually' for the tenth time count? Just never found the time this year…probably because I was too busy watching rubbish TV.

13. Watch less rubbish TV, read more good books

Epic fail on this one (see 12 above).

How did you get on with your new year plans in 2010?

Snow Keeps Falling

More snow this weekend....

The chance to try a bit of sledding and snowboarding... or even sledding on a snowboard! Highly recommended :-)

This was no time for cold feet...

Hope your weekends were brrrilliant!

Five Things I Hate About Christmas

Warning! Bah humbug theme throughout this post, which may not be suitable reading for those who absolutely love Christmas and everything about it...



1. Christmas shopping

It’s not the gift buying per se that I object to (my name’s not Ebenezer Scrooge, although I did once live in Ebenezer Road) but it’s the marauding masses with their screaming, sulking brats little darlings in tow that can make shopping such an awful experience. Long queues at the checkout, unhelpful shop staff and items that I want always out of stock on the shop floor, can add up to a very bad day out. Therefore, in the interests of personal sanity, this year I’ve done my entire Christmas shop online...I think I may be developing a bit of an obsession for internet shopping in fact... but I just love it! Clickety click....ding dong.... “Just sign here”....what a pleasure! Only problem is, half the jolly country has decided that this is the way forward, and, coupled with the snow disruption, there’s apparently a back log of over 4 million parcels to deliver. I’m now getting just a tad worried that not everything is going to arrive in time...



2. Brussels sprouts

I’ve already ranted on about my hatred of Satan’s green balls on here ... and you’re right, no one is actually forcing me to buy them, let alone eat them. They do, however, have a nasty habit of cropping up, completely uninvited, on my plate at Christmas parties. Apparently, they’re festive fare....fair, my foot! Just the sight of them, let alone their stench, is enough to make me retch!

 

3. Christmas pudding

Again, consumption of this stodgy ball of fruity, alcoholic fat is (thankfully!) not compulsory, and passing on the dessert course is one way to cut the calorific load of the Christmas day feast. I just don’t understand why anyone would pay vast sums of money for one such pudding, but that’s exactly what has been going on here in the UK this year. Celebrity chef Heston Blumenthal (famous for serving up such culinary delights as snail porridge, and bacon and egg ice-cream at his Three Michelin-starred restaurant, ‘The Fat Duck’) designed The Hidden Orange pudding, which has a whole candied Valencia orange at its centre, and is reputedly The Must-Have Christmas Pudding of The Century. The puds went on sale in Waitrose for £13.99 and were almost all sold out in a week, then started appearing on eBay, selling to the highest bidders for up to £129! The proof of that pudding will be in the eating, me thinks, but just don’t choke on that candied peel or it won’t be such a Merry Citrus....

4. Annoying fragrance ads

Until we get TV that emits a scent (possibly a good idea for cookery shows, not such a great one for workout programmes, or documentaries on sewage works), ad agencies are always going to struggle to sell perfume, the product, opting to rather promote the ‘lifestyle’ that apparently comes with it. And judging from the ads on TV at the moment, spraying yourself with perfume will immediately transform you into a sullen-looking, hollow-cheeked girl who dances bizarrely around rooms, or else drapes herself uncomfortably over a sofa, and awaits the entrance of some equally sullen-looking, rather effeminate bloke. Why do all perfume ads have to end with some random French words spoken in a breathy, exaggerated whisper?



5. Writing Christmas Cards

Spending as much time as I do on a keyboard, I’m rapidly losing the power to write anything by hand...how on earth did I ever get through university lectures taking notes, and write 4-hour exams? These days, just signing a couple of Christmas cards is enough to send my hand into arthritic spasms... forget putting little personal messages in each card, the recipients are lucky to get a spidery, scrawled “Love Nat”... maybe just an ‘N’ by the time I get to the end of the pile of dozens of cards I somehow feel obliged to send out each year. Then there’s the inevitable hour-long queue in the post office to contend with, followed by the heart palpitations that accompany the realisation of just how much it’s going to cost to send those cardboard creations across the globe...next year I’m doing e-cards!

 

So, is there anything you hate about Christmas....or do you just love, love, love it all?

10 Reasons Not To Get Drunk At Your Office Christmas Party

1. You may end up telling your...er...uptight (and pregnant for the second time round) manager: “I did worry about you having a baby...you and your husband were both already so highly strung, I thought becoming parents would send you over the edge!”
2. You could find yourself throwing your arms around the boss at the end of the evening, sobbing “You are the best boss I’ve ever had!”...not quite the great compliment it may seem, when everyone knows you’ve only worked for two companies in your life.
3. You might go around telling everyone that So-and-so (who fortunately is not actually at the office party this year) is "really quite useless and it’s a wonder she has not been fired by now".

4. You may get so drunk already at the pre-dinner drinks that you get a serious case of the munchies, and find yourself ordering a plate of nachos....nachos that get added to the total bar bill (£4,500), incurring a 10% service charge on the whole bill and meaning that those nachos cost your boss an extra £450!
5. You could still be so drunk from those pre-dinner drinks (the lousy nachos did nothing to soak up the alcohol) that you wind up falling asleep at the dinner table with your fork mid air, then later slump face first into your food.
6. You may have sober colleagues with cameras at hand to record you falling face first into your food...colleagues who print copies of those photos and distribute them around the whole office the following day.

7. You might convince yourself that you are The Dancing Queen (or Karaoke King) and subject your colleagues to appalling entertainment all night... colleagues who once again have those cameras to hand, and have also now befriended you on Facebook.
8. You may not notice you're suffering a wardrobe malfunction and be revealing far more of yourself to your colleagues than is quite frankly decent.

9. You could fall out of the party venue, pirouette helplessly on your 9 inch heels, then stumble into the arms of a passing stranger, exclaiming “That darn pavement is very dangerous!” (yes, deceptively flat, isn’t it?)
10. You may well suffer short-term memory loss and never know how on earth you got from London’s Soho district to Charing Cross station one mile away... but next thing you know you are on a train that is miraculously headed homewards (and at least you have the sense to call your husband and ask him to phone you when you're close to your home station, thus ensuring  you are awake to get off that train and don't end up riding to the end of the line)

These are lessons I’ve learnt over the past few years....from watching the drunken debauchery of my colleagues, I hasten to add....OK, OK, I may be guilty of that last one but that was back in the bad old days when I worked for the delightful swearing, shouting obnoxious boss and we were all determined to drink his inflated bank balance dry. Since then, though, I limit my intake to just enough to be sociable, but sober enough to watch the antics unfolding all around me.

How about you...did you think alcohol and office Christmas parties are a good combination?



A Touch Of Frost

The snow has melted, but a hoar frost has gripped the countryside - transforming the landscape with Nature's sugar coating....

Click on any photo to enlarge, then click back to return to my blog. 

Snow Business

You may have heard that we've had more than our fair share of snow in the UK this past week...enough to cause general chaos, airport closures, train stoppages, petrol shortages and panic food buying as the deliveries halted.

We didn't really get all that much around where I live..not like the metre-deep falls they've had to the north and south. Nevertheless, here are a few photos taken around my village, as requested by Wandering Saffa Chick....who is herself enjoying an Australian summer as we shiver, shake and slip about on the ice over here.

Hope you've all had a good weekend!

Ask Nat

I’ve just come across the slightly bizarre results of a survey of the most popular online queries by British website users in 2010. Here are some of the top searches, along with my own possibly less popular answers….forget Google, Yahoo and Ask Jeeves, just Ask Nat for that accurate, concise, informative and completely nonbiased response.



1. Why are England so bad at football?
Because our players are excessively overpaid, underworked, undisciplined, pretty ordinary blokes that have been bigged up to be some sort of demigods…..of course, this answer has absolutely nothing to do with my complete hatred of football and all things football-related.



2. Is the X-Factor fixed?
Is the Pope Catholic? Doesn’t stop me watching the show religiously every weekend though…

Viva The Lion King*!

(Wagner Carillo -  sadly, finally given the boot on Sunday after weeks of vast support from anti-X Factor campaigners who (allegedly) aimed to teach Simon Cowell a lesson by spending lots of money on his show's premium-rate phone votes)

3. Who is Justin Bieber?
To be honest, I only know this because I caught him miming (badly) during his guest appearance on Sunday night’s X-Factor results show…apparently, he (and there was a moment when I thought someone that pretty must be a Justina!) is the hottest, overhyped thing since... well, the last hottest, overhyped thing to strut his stuff before his adoring teenage fans. Yes, I’m just a grumpy old woman…old enough to be his mother (actually, make that his grandmother!)



4. Do all footballers cheat [on their wives/girlfriends]?
Quite possibly…see answer to number 1 above.



5. Should I buy an iPad?
Are you the person who has it all now and can find nothing else to buy? Do you fancy lugging about an oversized iphone? Do you like expensive coffee table ornaments?

If you’ve answered 'yes!' to any of these questions, then yes.



6. What is ‘Glee’?
A bit like a polished, slicker version of the ‘80s TV show ‘Fame’, with better hairdos and clothes….worth watching, just for the witty “Sue Sylvester”.

Snappy and snarky in a track suit

7. Will ‘Big Brother’ ever come back?
Oh hell, I really hope not! We are already overpopulated with pointless non-celebrities...



8. Where can I buy a micro pig?
Old Macdonald’s Micro Farm?

Just don't mention Swine Flu!

9. Where is the ash cloud?
It was in the sky…thankfully not any more though.



10. Where can I buy a vuvuzela?
You're not allowed one.... unless you're 10 or younger! Again, this answer has absolutely nothing to do with my complete hatred of football and all things football-related.

* Wagner owns a pet lion. As you do.

But Seriously...



I’m saddened to learn that one of my favourite comedy actors of all time, Leslie Nielsen, passed away yesterday at the age of 84. He was truly the master of the deadpan...able to say absurd lines while keeping his face as straight as the Sphinx’s.

Here are just a few examples, taken from his most popular films, Airplane! (in which he played passenger Dr Rumack) and the Naked Gun series (in which he played the bumbling detective Lt Frank Drebin).

Frank: It's the same old story. Boy finds girl, boy loses girl, girl finds boy, boy forgets girl, boy remembers girl, girl dies in a tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year's Day.
Jane: Goodyear?
Frank: No, the worst.
The Naked Gun: From the files of Police Squad, 1988



Rumack: Can you fly this plane, and land it?
Ted Striker [a qualified pilot who hasn’t flown in years]: Surely you can't be serious.
Rumack: I am serious... and don't call me Shirley.
Airplane!, 1980



Rumack: I won't deceive you, Mr. Striker. We're running out of time.
Ted Striker: Surely there must be something you can do.
Rumack: I'm doing everything I can... and stop calling me Shirley!
Airplane!, 1980


Frank: Now, Jane, what can you tell us about the man you saw last night?
Jane: He's Caucasian.
Ed: Caucasian?
Jane: Yeah, you know, a white guy. A moustache. About six-foot-three.
Frank: Awfully big moustache.
The Naked Gun: From the files of Police Squad, 1988



[Jane Spencer climbs a ladder]
Frank [standing underneath]: Nice beaver!
Jane: [producing a stuffed beaver] Thank you. I just had it stuffed.
The Naked Gun: From the files of Police Squad, 1988
 
Frank: That's the red-light district. I wonder why Savage is hanging around down there.
Ed: Sex, Frank?
Frank: Uh, no, not right now, Ed.
The Naked Gun 2½: The Smell of Fear, 1991

 
R.I.P. Shirley....I mean Leslie.