Showing posts with label A Day In The Life Of Nat. Show all posts
Showing posts with label A Day In The Life Of Nat. Show all posts

Thursday, 10 October 2013

Close Encounters Of The Bovine Kind....

A final post from my Alpine Adventures series....



So.... it's the first day of our hiking holiday and we're about ten minutes into our first of many uphills to come, up a steep and narrow forest path. It's raining lightly, but we're sheltered among the trees....  

We hear them, long before we see them. The soothing melody of cow bells, echoing down the mountain.


Oh look! It's a lovely cow with a cowbell!! Got to get a photo of that!

Ahhh, such a cute looking cow.... hang on! She does seem to be moving a lot closer to us. In fact, she's on the run....


Mad French cow! Madder than a box of frogs


Two minutes later, said mad cow has me backed into a large and very prickly bush, with nowhere to hide. Her head down, horns aimed at my stomach, and I'm contemplating a painful death by goring... believe me, female cows have massive great bastard horns on them too!....and highly peeved that I've not even made it past the first hour of the first hike.

Lick! Lick! Euuuuuch! All she wanted to do was give a big fat slobbery lick with her enormous rough tongue!

The first of many bovine encounters that week... fortunately, none as formidable as that one....


Keeping a safe distance!


Thirsty cow - possibly mad too


Italian cow - less formidable than her French counterparts!








Silly cows!


This one had no beef with me!

Monday, 6 May 2013

Monday, 29 April 2013

Things I Saw This Weekend...





  • A man with a floor-length dread-lock beard and a woman carrying a ginormous “Lottery Winner” style cheque at Schiphol airport.


  • Idiots Abroad posing in over-sized clogs at every corner.


  • Enough Gouda cheese to feed the world’s population of mice for a decade and then some!




Yes, I finally got to see the beautiful spring tulips in The Netherlands on a day trip this weekend... some of you may recall that a pesky Icelandic volcano (or more accurately, its accursed ash cloud!) that grounded flights across Europe put paid to my original plans to go Dutch back in 2010. 

It's taken me three years to get my act together and make the quick hop over on the stupid o'clock "Squeezy Jet" flight to Amsterdam, nab the Keukenhof Express bus from Schiphol and spend the day sleep-deprived and tanked up on strong black coffee and sugary waffles, but surrounded by Mother Nature at her most awesome.

Just 771 photos to sort through first before I can share some of them with you all... and there are still loads from my South African trip too. I'd best get cracking...




Sunday, 20 January 2013

39

A snowy day....









A long lunch finishing with delicious sticky toffee pudding...





Loads of phone calls, texts and messages from family and friends near and far.

Not a bad way to celebrate the start of the last year of my 30s. I have decided that I won't be getting any older.... just more sophisticated, stylish, elegant, poised and chic - I reckon I've a fair way to go!




All photos taken with my  phone camera


Thursday, 6 September 2012

Things I Won't Miss While I'm On Holiday....

1. Annoying Demanding Client #1.

2. Annoying Demanding Client #1.

3. Annoying Demanding Client #1.

Oh yes.... and Annoying Demanding Client #1!

You may have read some of my earlier posts on Annoying Demanding Client #1, such as over here, here and here.

She really knows how to grate my carrot. Pee on my battery. Make like a laxative and irritate the shite out of me!

Today was no exception....

14:01 PM - Email from ADC #1
Please be advised that I am sending you X and X and X, Y, Z for your immediate attention.

14:02 PM - Email from ADC #1
Please confirm that you have received X and X and X,Y, Z

14:05 PM - Email from ADC #1
I have just tried to call you but your line is engaged [Yes, I'm on a call with Nice, Reasonable Client]
I need you to confirm you have received X and X and X,Y, Z and inform me of your immediate availability to start working on these reports.

14:08 PM - Email from ADC #1
There seems to be a problem with your email server as you are clearly not receiving mine. I will be taking this up with our IT Desk. [And if my email was out of action, exactly how can I be reading this?]

14:10 PM - Email from ADC #1
I have just been informed by the Chief Executive Very Important Big Cheese [i.e. ADC#1's boss] that this project has been postponed. No further action must be taken.


......
Did I ever mention that I got to meet ADC#1 in person earlier this year? She flew in for a series of meetings at their UK office and demanded my presence at said UK office. It was quite an experience....

ADC#1 in person was not anything like the image I had conjured up in my mind.

I had imagined someone like this....


Only a lot older!

And instead, she looks more like this.....



....just with more bling and skin tight jeans and killer heels! Yes, in the office!!! And she's probably younger than I am!


Never judge a book by its cover..... or a client by their voice.  Knowing just how Annoyingly Damn Cute ADC#1 is, did nothing to endear her to me though....

.....

PS It's Operation Pack For Thailand in Nat's household at the moment, but I'm hoping to still get chance to pop round to all your blogs before I jet off....

Sunday, 5 February 2012

Walking In A Winter Wonderland

Overnight snowfalls made for a beautiful walk this morning.....





































My hubby found a good use for the snow he shovelled from the driveway... to build a snowman!


Thursday, 8 December 2011

Crazy. Stupid. Busy.





I’ve been off the bloggersphere for a little while. Kind of conspicuous by my absence, so to speak... or rather type.

So....what has been happening in the Life of Nat?

Quite a lot, actually... there have been some crazy high jinks, some should-have-known-better-stupid escapades, and some run-of-the mill domestic stuff.

First up, the high jinks, or rather Air Kix. One night last week I got to try out indoor skydiving... body flying in a wind tunnel, set up to simulate free falling at 24,000 feet.

There is no way on this planet (or indeed the wider galaxy for that matter) that I am ever going to jump out of a ‘plane with just a silk sheet strapped to my back to spare me from making like a cow pat (splattery splat!) in a big open field of ruminating bovines. So this is possibly the next best thing. And perhaps slightly less dangerous than my foiled attempts at paragliding.

Here I am looking rather ...er... fly! And large...







Loads of fun and definitely something I would try again.


And so onto the stupid escapades... or rather “This one time, when I temporarily lost all sense of proportion and imagined I was back in my drunken undergraduate student days!”

My liver certainly thought Nat was partying like it was 1993....

It was my office Christmas party this past weekend... a 3-course dinner, obligatory cheesy disco for those so inclined, and then midnight taxis home for the local residents or a night in the hotel for those of us living further afield. I should have listened to the Sensible, One-Glass-Of-Wine-Is-My-Limit Nat sitting on my shoulder, and retired to my comfy hotel bed as the Pumpkin Hour struck.



Random shot of hotel light fittings


But I didn’t.

“A quick night cap” in the hotel bar with the other stayer-overs (is that even a word?) turned into a few. And then someone had the bright idea of “finishing it all off with a shot”...

Next thing we know it’s gone 4 am and we have steadily worked our way through a selection of liqueurs.

Tequila! She makes me happy!

So does sambuca, disaronno, Bailey’s, vodka and kahlua...




The bar man is politely asking us to “Leave right now people! Just get out!!!” and actually escorting us from the premises...

Amazingly, I wake up 6 hours later feeling rather chirpy, which is more than can be said for my ‘tache-touting, everyone-was-my-buddy-last-night’ husband (who by the way has been so flattered by the positive response to his whiskers that he’s keeping them till the New Year). The hangover struck with a vengeance on the drive home...

I spent the rest of Sunday semi-comatose on the couch, unfit for purpose, which did nothing for the progress of Operation Christmas Preparation. With a whole horde of visitors about to descend upon us between now and the Big Day itself, I have been on a frenzied hosting hyper drive...planning meals, ordering van loads of groceries, sorting out the guest bedroom, getting the Christmas cards posted, gifts wrapped, Christmas tree decorated, Christmas cake boozed...

Someone please hit the “Pause button”!

Wednesday, 30 November 2011

Can You Use That In A Sentence, Please?




Ah..... my dearly beloved clients! I've gotta love 'em.... apart from keeping me in employment, they provide me with endless inspiration. Mainly inspiration on how not to behave unless you want to be classified as a complete raving lunatic slightly high maintenance. But inspiration nonetheless.


Like how to make every email appear far more complicated (and therefore far more important) than it needs to be.

It's quite simple really... just add a whole lot of unnecessary or daft words. Then sprinkle liberally with "regarding".

Exhibit A 
"With regards our recent conversation regarding the updates regarding...."



Be sure to use the word "pursuant" whenever possible....

Exhibit B
"Pursuant to our recent teleconference...." or "Pursuant to your email"


Better yet, use words completely out of context, whenever possible... again this will make things appear far more urgent than they really are (and possibly even quite secretive)...

Exhibit C
"I will discuss this with you later today, following our internal review meeting that is currently transpiring."






Don't be afraid to be melodramatic ...

Exhibit D
"There is a mighty sword poised over our necks. If we do not get the documents in time, it will be the end of us."


Or intimidate with title dropping...

Exhibit E
"I will have to discuss that with our Big Cheese Global Vice President of Very-Important-Sounding Functions-That-Are-Not-All-That....."


The power of downright rudeness should never be underestimated. It won't win you any friends though, so proceed with caution...

Exhibit F
" Send me the document NOW!"
or "I MUST HAVE IT BY 3PM TODAY!" .




And if all else fails, get touchy-feely

Exhibit G
"I am reaching out to you right now, to ask you to..." [Client with exceptionally long arms, obviously...able to reach right across the Atlantic]




Friday, 11 November 2011

11.11.11

So.... I had planned on posting something witty and intellectual on the numerical significance of today.

It's not going to happen.

The only numbers I'm thinking of right now are how many years I'm likely to get if I were to hop on a plane, zip across the Atlantic, barge into the office of Most-Annoying-And-Demanding Client.... and throttle the life out of her.




Happy weekend everyone and catch up with you next week....

Sunday, 11 September 2011

Une Journée à Paris




Some days, I just need a little adventure...

Like getting up in the middle of the night to catch the stupid o'clock train down to London St Pancras... to grab some cheap, last-minute tickets on the Paris-bound 06.22am Eurostar.




Two and a half hours later, and I was buying my Carte Mobilis (one-day Metro pass) at Gare du Nord. First stop: ÃŽle de la Cité, for the majestic cathedral of Notre-Dame (Our Lady)....


Notre-Dame Cathedral


Then across the Pont St Louis to ÃŽle Saint-Louis... for pistachio and melon ice cream at the famous Glacier Berthillon.




A walk along the quays of the Left Bank of the River Seine....






And a cruise on the river...


Batobus in front of the Museum D'Orsay


A stroll down the Champs-Élysées....




Delicious macaroons at 'Angelina' on Rue Rivoli....




A walk through the Jardin des Tuileries...



And the Jardin du Carrousel....


Arc de Triomphe du Carousel


There was no time to say "Bonjour!" to the Mona Lisa, as the evening was drawing in...


The Louvre




It was time to hop back on the Metro and get back to Gare Du Nord for the 20.13pm Eurostar back to London...




Au revoir, Paris! More photos to follow....