Things I Learnt On My Thai Holiday...

Red or green. Fresh or dried. Big or small. If it's a chilli... it's HOT!!!

I have an insatiable appetite for satay chicken. I ate it at least once a day for 10 days straight and could still murder a plateful right now!

I had previously underestimated the nutritional value of ice cream. According to an enthusiastic vendor on Choeng Mon beach, we should all be eating ice cream every day because.... "Ice cream! Ice cream! Full of vitamin. Make you sexy! Ice cream?!!!"

I overestimated the nutritional value of Thai Airways' low-calorie meal. In an attempt to balance the scales after all that satay chicken, I ordered the healthy option for my flights. Here's what I got...

The fruit and water diet

In Thailand, there are dudes that look like a lady... and they are far prettier than Steve Tyler, even on a good day.

My capacity to maintain a horizontal position is quite substantial, if the view's OK....like this....

But not this....

This view is not OK. Under any circumstances! 

Put some clothes on, man... or at least a pair of Bermudas!

If you like being pulled and pushed, pummelled and slapped, stretched into previously unknown yoga positions and then pulled in another direction... you'll love a traditional Thai massage! Nothing kinky, please note... the only happy ending is the fact that the pain is finally over. But you do feel wonderful afterwards and very energised....

My heroic husband's spider disposal skills are cosmopolitan and international.... extending to a VERY large, VERY hairy and generally VERY scary-looking Thai spider that was attempting to stowaway back to London in our luggage.

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More on all these things soon....

And I hope to catch up on all your blogs soon too!