On Godmothers (Fairy And Otherwise)

My dad has started his second cycle of chemo...so far so good again and he's feeling OK. Cross fingers, hold thumbs, knock on wood, hope, pray...and wish.... that it continues to be so and that the treatment makes a difference.

Do fairy godmothers still grant wishes?


As a small child, I used to confuse my real godmother with the benevolent fairy of some of my favourite, made-for-Disney stories. The two were not that different really...she lived very far away (Cape Town) and sent me lovely presents for my birthdays and Christmas. I didn't really get to know my godmother until I was an adult. She was a spinster, who'd dedicated much of her adult life to looking after her aging parents. I later found out she'd passed up the chance to marry the love of her life because he was divorced and her parents did not approve of the match. Shortly after that, she'd had her heart broken by a cad who stole loads of her money and did a runner.

When I moved to Cape Town to study, my godmother became more a part of my life and it was kind of cool having her around. At least once a month she would pick me up from my halls of residence and take me back to her comfy flat for lunch or supper...always a treat to eat non-mass-produced food. When B came on the scene, she warmed to him almost immediately and extended her lunch invitations to him. For some reason we always seemed to end up having Sunday lunch with her the day after a heavy night of drinking and clubbing. Green about the gills, we'd both politely refuse the customary glass of sherry on offer, hoping we didn't still reek of cheap booze. A bit straight-laced by nature, my godmother did not completely approve of my student lifestyle (and she got to hear the edited version). She was also not too impressed when B and I decided to "live in sin" but did offer us some much needed pots and pans for our sparsely furnished flat. Needless to say she was overjoyed when we finally decided to make honest persons of ourselves and get married.

Now that I'm living in the UK, I keep in touch with my godmother by the odd phone call - she phones me on my birthday, I phone her on hers, and she's become quite deft at sending text messages. It's now my turn to send her gifts... she's a suduko fanatic, but refuses to pay the greatly inflated prices of puzzle books in South Africa...so it's easy to pop a book in the post to her.

On Sunday I'm becoming a godmother myself for the second time round.....something I am quite excited about. Wonder if I'm qualified?

B and I have decided to remain childfree....simply because we do not want children of our own. I like children, and enjoy those of others...but have no desire to have them around 24-7. I knew in my early 20s that motherhood was not for me, but everyone said that I would change my mind, my biological clock would start ticking and I would start wanting a baby....well, either I'm deaf or my clock needs a new battery, as in my mid 30s I feel even less inclined. Luckily, I'm from a generation and culture where it is acceptable for a woman to remain childless, and more importantly, I'm married to a man of the same opinion....well, we wouldn't have gotten married if we differed over something so fundamental.

I am alway very happy when friends or family who really want children start a family, and it's great to see the joy they get from their children. It's flattering to be asked to be a godparent by your friends...I hope that I will be a good one and make some positive contribution to my goddaughters' lives.